In Whisker City and all across Whisker Land, there comes a time in every cat's life when our thoughts turn to life's more significant questions. When we're young, dumb, and full of fun, it's hard to see beyond the next sleep, the next bowl of milk, the next chase of your tail: life is for living, rules are for fools, and you can deep think when you die. But then suddenly, one day, it happens, mid-lick - you stop, and just like that, you realize you're wrong. You can't deep think when you die, because you're dead. And in a flash (of fur), you realize that your outlook has changed. You discover that, actually, a good friend coughing up a fur ball is no longer the funniest thing on the planet. You start keeping an actual count of your lives. How many have I lost? If I run across that big road without looking, will I lose another one – should I stay here instead and stare at a leaf, or perhaps go sniff some butts? And then, you realize even butt-sniffing doesn't grab you like it used to, and you have to face facts: you're getting older. Or wiser. It could be both. Or possibly neither. But either way, you start to ask yourself life's BIG questions:
- Why are we here?
- What happens after we die?
- What is love?
- When's dinner?
- Why do I purr?
- Why are there dogs?
- Why do I enjoy knocking things off tables?
But there's always been one question that some have been afraid to ask – out loud, anyway. A question relegated - in polite pussycat society anyhow – to whispered behind-the-scenes kitty-chat. Why? Because that question is…
Why Do Cats Like Catnip?
It's an ugly truth to accept sometimes, and one which local Projects legend Kingpin is keen to change with his top-of-the-range, community-minded cat nip, but we live in a world where the opinions of some cats are deemed to be worth double the opinions of others. So we went flap-flicking and offered a free hit of the good stuff, of the best catnip there is – Cat Crack - to six different highly respected pure-bred house cats from Whisker City's well-to-do Uptown district in return for telling us: why do you do catnip? And here's what they said.
Catnip Keeps Cats Calm
Name: Noodle
Breed: Abyssinian
Why do you like catnip? When I was younger, I was diagnosed with FRAP Syndrome, meaning I had Frenetic Random Activity Periods – aka 'Bad Zoomies,' meaning zoomies, all the time. An occasional zoomie – some cats even get it from catnip – is natural. But I was hyperactive. Always. I just couldn't help but shimmy up curtains, show off on banisters, or suddenly sprint out of the room for no apparent reason. It was, they said, annoying. One hit of Cat Crack, though, and I can be calm. Peace.
Catnip Cures Boredom
Name: Belinda
Breed: Bengal
Why do you like catnip? Do cats like catnip? You better believe it! You know, adult cat life can be pretty cat-dang dull. When you're a kitten, it's all losing lives, catfights, and chasing tail 'n ting. But when you become a mama, it all changes. Suddenly, you're a feline food pump. They're latching on to you left right and center. Frankly, I never knew I had so many nipples. And then there's the flees. I mean, I always kept myself clean. But now, I'm washing four of the furry little fleabags a day. Cat nip – why, that's the only fun I have! That's playtime, baby!
Catnip Promotes Exercise
Name: Blobby Brown
Breed: American Shorthair
Why do you like catnip? I was fat, I mean, really fat. Sometimes, if I was resting on my side, trying to make it look like I was washing my front leg, it was pretty hard to get back up again. So I'd just lie there and ask: 'What's my motivation?" And it was food – always food. I was getting bigger, and I knew things were getting really bad when I was mistaken for a cushion. Then, they replaced the cat flap with a 'small animal flap.' The humiliation. That's when I discovered the Catnip Diet*. Nobody told me to eat less food, so I was happy. "Just eat catnip too" they said. Well OK! And did it work? Well, look at me now! Every hit's a workout - rolling, writhing, stretching, pouncing, flipping. Thanks to catnip, I'm half the cat I used to be. (*The Catnip Diet does not exist).
Catnip Gives Pain Relief
Name: Lenny
Breed: Burmese
Why do you like catnip? What does catnip do? Well, I'm a stunt cat. I've always got aches and pains, cuts and bruises. And, well, I don't like popping painkillers. My old man used to say, "If it's not from nature, it's not gonna nurture," so I guess I'm kinda cynical about Big Pussycat Pharma and its money-making ways. And what is catnip? It's a plant from the cat mint family…so I was in. For me, it just smooths away the rough edges after a busy day, like a warm dust bath or a saucer of cool milk. It just makes me feel that little bit better. And I always feel confident that I'm sticking to my principles because I always buy 100% natural 'nip.
Catnip Reduces Anxiety
Name: Stephen
Breed: Russian Blue
Why do you like catnip? I used to suffer from terrible anxiety. Anything could set me off. Not just the usual things – a toaster popping, the sound of a vacuum cleaner, dogs off leads – it could be anything. I found making friends difficult, and I looked a mess: my fur was patchy, I weed everywhere, and sometimes I would just lash out. OK, I admit that the last one could be fun, but overall, I was stressed and unhappy. Nowadays, catnip is my 'safe space.' It keeps my nerves under control – it's wonderful for moggy mindfulness.
Catnip is Good for Cats
Name: Suzie
Breed: Siamese
Why do you like catnip? I used to do catnip because it was naughty – because other cats sniffed at it. I mean, of course, they actually didn't sniff at it, and that was the problem. If they had sniffed at it, they would have understood what they were missing. Anyway, we're getting off the point here. You'll cut all that, right? Basically, I used to do catnip because it was 'bad' – like clawing a lap, scratching a new carpet, or bringing in a regurgitated mouse. And when you're a cool cat like me - everyone knows Siamese cats are highly superior - bad was good, you get me? See, I may be slinky, smooth and sophisticated, but I'm down with the kittens - I know what's what on the streets - unlike these scaredy-cats Uptown. But in truth, deep down, I could never understand why it was bad (meaning bad) because it was actually always good (meaning good). Really good (meaning really good): fun, relaxing, good for exercise, healthy… what's not to love? Nowadays, of course, all the mainstream moggies are catching on, so it's not so cool anymore - but I'll always keep doing it. Today, it's just my guilty pleasure.
